When the world conspires to make you look very, very dumb...

I take OPKs (ovulation predictor kits) every day leading up to my ovulation so I can tell when I'm about to ovulate.  Simple, right?

Hmm, not so much in my case apparently!

I haven't taken one in the since December since I spent the majority of this year pregnant so I had them all in my big box that I ordered from an online provider.  Last Sunday, I pull a test from the box and pee on it and it comes out NEGATIVE.

Well, that wasn't the shocking part.  The shocking part was that the OPK didn't even have a faint line indicating that my LH hormone was starting to rise. LH hormone surge suggests an ovulation in the next 24-48 hours so usually there is a line even if it's really faint.

I take another one on Tuesday and that test is just invalid.  It's a dud test so the control line doesn't even come up.

Yesterday, I'm in my lovely walk-in closet that my dear hub built for me and I pull out 2 tests intending to stuff one in my work bag so I can test at my usual 2PM time.  I flip the test over and "OMG, what is THAT!"

So here's an explanation...tests from this place come in the same type of packaging.  The OPK have a green cover and describe what they are while the pregnancy test are all white with some illegible writing on it.

The problem is that I forgot tabout the OPK being green and peed on 2 white PREGNANCY tests this week by accident.  Amazingly enough, Dre didn't seem to think I was as stupid as I thought this story made me seem when I told him.'

Now, I'm off to the dollar store to find pregnancy tests since I wasted mine this week.  If you don't hear from me soon, it's because I'm still hunting around for cheap tests 'cause there's no way in hell I'm paying $15 for ONE First Response test unless I'm trying to confirm what my cheap ass pregnancy test already told me.