Babies EVERYWHERE

There are people having babies right around the time I would be due left and right.  

At first, I was so thankful that none of my friends were pregnant so that I could avoid what hundreds of women seem to post about on TB.  Having pregnant friends/relatives/coworkers EVERYWHERE!

Well, now I can’t seem to get away from it and for some reason this week I’ve been having a bigger problem with it.  I thought I was doing okay and past everything now that Dre and I are on the road to TTC (trying to conceive) again, but it seems like it’s hard to get by that feeling that, “I SHOULD be having a baby in September, I SHOULD be this far along, I SHOULD be doing such and such this summer.”  

Anyways, half of Dre’s co-workers are pregnant and not only that, but most of them are due a couple of weeks before I would have been due.  So, I don’t really want to hear about it most of the time especially when Dre comes home and announces to me that his co-worker is now 23 weeks along.  Why I needed to know that is just beyond me.

This morning, I had a business meeting and I noticed one the presenters was pregnant.  She told us she was due September 23^rd.  Really!  I’m happy for her, but it seems like I just can’t get away from these August/September due dates.

So needless to say that with all of that and the fact that half the blogs I read announced they were expecting around the time I would have announced it has made me a little depressed and down.

I’m gonna end my ranting now.  I think it makes me come across as bitter and angry, but some days that’s how I feel.  I guess that before I had a miscarriage I didn’t really understand when people would talk about being bitter and angry about the situation/people/comments/etc.  It’s hard to understand if you haven’t been there yourself I guess.

Finding a post title is damn hard!

 Earlier, I sent Dre an email

Me: Make a note to ask Receptionist for your March Chiropractor Expenses

Dre: But that’s why I have a wife…

The man sure likes to walk on the wild and dangerous side.  So annoying!

So then I felt the need to point out that I won’t be following him around at the chiropractor’s today making sure he asks.  His response…

Dre: But my wife love meJ 

Aw, he’s so cute and so amazingly annoying all at the same time…sassy husband!  Same as when he was helping the BIL assemble his new BBQ this weekend.  He kept asking where his beer was.  As if I was gonna go get him one.   

Hmmm, husband…have you met me?

Eventually, Dre and BIL got done with the BBQ and the in-laws fed us.  See I’m not above whoring…errrm….lending out my husband to score food.  Especially when that food is those yummy potatoes my SIL makes or the fact that she likes to drink almost as much as I do.  So of course we drank Porn Stars.  They were fabulous!



Our drink of choice was of course...PORN STARS.
 That is not one, but the glass is pretty and I don't feel like loosing my job when I googly Porn Star at work.
Wonder, how many clueless people Googled that got my post instead...hehe!



Hmmm, he reads this so I might have some explaining to do in a day or two.  

Errr, husband I wasn’t trying to get food out of your sister or taking advantage of poor BIL’s complete lack of building skills (according to SIL that is…he’s always managed to build stuff when I’m around, but that might be cause Dre’s around to keep him from injuring himself).  

Yeah, maybe I should just stop typing now…



Beat off those pounds

In the news, AF finally decided to join us.  I didn’t even need to POAS to induce her into coming!  

So now my ovulation should fall right around the time Dre and I are going for our much delayed anniversary weekend.  Dre is rubbing his hands in glee at the thought!  Hehe…

Our wedding anniversary is in February, but we had cancelled our trip to the Sandbanks where we were supposed to stay at a vineyard and take a wine tour and drinks lots and lots of wine.  The wine drinking was the problem you see since I was pregnant.  

So when I had my miscarriage, I suggested to Dre that we take a chance and rebook our trip.  So…in 2 weeks we are taking off and going to drink lots and lots of wine while doing the baby dance and not counting one damn calorie.

Have I mentioned that I’ve started counting my calories in the hopes of losing some weight.  Dear little failed pregnancy gifted me with 4 extra pounds which I managed to pack on in the month after my miscarriage.  Apparently, miscarriages are not conducive to loosing weight.

So I said, “Screw you body!  I refuse to weigh over 160 lbs!” since that would officially put my 5’7 frame into the overweight category according to all the lovely BMI charts out there.  No thank you!

Now, I could go do another boot camp with my SIL.  Side note...she wants to do another one.  She’s obviously lost her mind and yes she reads this!  The problem is that I loathe, despise and abhor exercise.  Where those words too strong to convey my dislike?  No.  Good.

Also, when we did 2 months of said boot camp I lost 0 pounds which was very depressing.  Yes, I lost some inches, but for doing thousands upon thousands (I’m not exaggerating this time) of push ups I would have thought I would lose some weight.  

Plants, temps, and nerves

It is Friday people! Rejoice and dance a happy dance with me!

Then go listen to this...it will stay in your brain forever and you'll want to stab yourself with a rusty knife though.

Ok, you're back...didn't say I didn't warn you:-)

So my sciatic nerve is acting up today.  I get this when AF is about to visit me or while she's visiting me; it's one of the ways that I know that it's coming.  Of course when I dressed this morning, I didn't realize that my sciatic nerve would bother me so I wore my skinny, tight jeans.  This morning I kept having to convince my leg that I hadn't cut off the blood supply.  Fun times!

That along with some plunging temps this morning have pretty much convinced me that this month AF will be visiting me.  I was going to POAS (pee on a stick) tomorrow, but now I think I'll wait to see what my temp is tomorrow and decide whether or not I'll wait it out.

It's really nice outside today...about 14C and sunny.  The weekend and most of next week is also gearing up to be really nice and warm so Dre wants to go scour all the garden centers this weekend. 

What?  Nope, we're not starting our gardens now. Way too early for Canada!  Learned that lesson last year. 

Dre wants to get a head start at building me boxes for our garden this year.  Last summer, our garden spent most of its life swimming in water (it rained and we found out that our backyard doesn't drain that well) so now we're making a raised garden.  I want it enclosed in wood and at least a foot high which should allow all the extra water to drain out this year.  Or so I hope!

Also, I'm going to plant all my tomato plants in planters that I'll put on our front balcony since it gets more sun.  For the garden, I was thinking tomatoes, yellow beans, salad, cucumbers, onions, garlic, potatoes, and maybe broccoli.  It's the veggies I think grow the best around here.  When we get a bigger house with a bigger backyard, I'll probably start planting a lot more stuff, but for now that's good.

This morning I brought our car to the dealership to get the summer tire put on, and oil change, and the windows tinted.  We bought a Mitsubishi Outlander 2010 in September of last year and I haven't had the time to get all the windows tinted.  The back windows did come with what they call a Privacy Tint, but that's not much help for us in the front seats and I thought the Privacy Tint was way too light. 

Now, I'm kind of nervous to see what the car looks like when I go pick it up in an hour.  Hopefully, we like it!

Plans for this weekend include doing nothing, drinking some wine, going to browse garden stuff, and possibly watching a movie or two.  I really enjoy this kind of weekend and now that summer is coming there won't be too many more.  Summer is our really busy time...we usually have something planned almost every weekend.

2 Week Wait of Hell

Google search for Happy Dance

Happy news!  The house guest is gone!!!!  I have to say that I don't hate people, but I hate them when they're in my house unless they are 1 of approximately 5 people who I could tell, "You're annoying me!" to.

So happy dance 'cause it's all Dre and I and no else now.  Dre's happy to...he gets more sex now...cause really is there a good way to be like, "Errrrr, I know it's only 6 PM, but we're going now...er...to...err...nap."  Yeah, nope it's just really awkward:-)

So in other news, I've been charting my temps this month hoping to get back in the habit of waking up at the godawful hour of 6AM and staying awake long enough to take my temperature AND write it down. 

It's not as easy as it seems people.

Half the time, I go back to sleep and realize that my mouth is open and I'm letting all this cold air touch the damn thermometer so now I have to start again.  The other half of the time, I can't even find my mouth to put the thermometer in because I'm still asleep.  It's a problem people!

Anyways, I've been charting and have been expecting AF anytime now since it's been 5 weeks since my miscarriage.  Lo and behold all of sudden, my chart shows a damn ovulation on day FREAKING 27!  Well, no AF for my until I'm at least 6 weeks from miscarriage now.

Don't get me wrong, I'm ecstatic that my body is cooperating and has decided to start doing the ovulation thing again so soon, but this chart is gonna mess all my averages on Fertility Friend and all that shit. 

Even crazier is the fact that Dre and I definitely had sex on the Sunday that I ovulated.  So much for waiting until AF showed up before we started trying again.  I guess my body was not happy with that plan so it decided to rebel:-)

So now I'm in the dreaded 2 week waiting period before I can test.  I'm 10 days past ovulation today so I could technically test, but last time when I actually got pregnant I got a BFN (that's a negative) at 9 days past ovulation (DPO) and my positive was when I decided to retest at 16 DPO.  So now FF wants me to wait until I'm 16 days DPO which is next Tuesday by the way until I test.

I swear I'm gonna go crazy by then!  The problem is that I've been down this road recently and while I looked forward to testing every month I didn't worry about it overmuch or get too depressed about seeing a BFN.  As someone on The Bump said last week, "As you all know m/c really sucks the innocent bliss out of pregnancy."  I couldn't find a better way to express my feelings. 

Last time, I went innocently along not even thinking about the testing crap until I took a test on Christmas Eve to find out if I could drink.  And when it was negative, I just waited for AF who was sure to come.  Even when i was 5 days late, I was wondering if I should really test because every other time I tested in the morning and AF came later that day.  And then I tested and the damn test was actually positive.  That was utterly shocking!

This time I just feel like there's a hammer poised over my head just waiting to smack on the head.  There is no carefree gallivanting across these 2 weeks to my periods...there's just waiting. 

Unbearable, agonizing waiting.

So you'll find me here waiting for another 6 days unless I decide to pee on a test this weekend just to keep myself more sane.

Blogger

Blogger just ate my post.

FUCK YOU BLOGGER!

That is all.

Happy April Fool's Day

So today is the day that everyone tries to sell you one crazy idea after another. 

This year...I'm ready!  Bring it on!

I even sent Dre and email informing him that I had quit my job.  And...he fell for it!  Gold, people, gold!

I'm not big on April Fool's Jokes, but last year Dre sent me an email telling me he had to work on a Saturday when we had plans and lots of stuff going on and I fell for it hook, line, and sinker.  I sent him a huge email about it and then he laughed his ass off at me.  So very annoying! 

So this year, it was my turn!  Hehe!  Totally, my turn to laugh my ass off.

I can remember how excited me and my younger brother would get when we were kids about this day.  We'd spend the whole week before April 1st making brightly colored fishes of all sizes.  Then on the 1st we would stalk around and lurk under furniture just so we could put one of these fishes on people without them noticing. I have no idea why we thought that people wouldn't figure out that when you slapped them on the back you had also hung a fish on their back.  They always noticed and even if they didn't we would follow them around giggling until they guessed.

We were not that smart apparently.  You might be asking why on earth we'd run around trying to hang fish on people's clothes.  Yeah, it's weird, but I think it might be because the day is called April's Fish in French.  So all the English people who've never, ever done this now think I'm certifiable.

That's OK, 'cause they're probably right!

So all of this to tell you people to go smack a fish on someone's back today or tell them some outrageous lie that they just might believe.  It will bring back lots of childhood memories....and those are the best!